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Devious Journal Entry
1 min read
i have created a new account, shakira-randy i will no longer be on this one
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the question is why...?
1 min read
to ask why we fight, is to ask why the leaves fall, it is in there nature.
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A Second Chance
3 min read
As days passed
Weeks felt like months.
I find myself obsessed,
Obsessed with the thought of death.
The thoughts flowed through me like blood,
Heavy tear weighed me down with grief.
Nothing would stop me from hurting,
The pain would just grow stronger inside.
The pain of the razor blade was vast to my skin,
Listening to every droplet of blood.
My heart stopped,
The tears broke through the fear.
I fell weaker each day,
I was being ripped apart, slowly.
Night after night I cried myself to sleep,
But tears were never enough.
I sat down, and thought,
I don't want to live like this any more.
I know I should be strong,
but I am unable.
My mind and fear took over,
My heart is far to scared.
I can't live like this any more,
I'm ready now, I know this is my fate.
My head down,
Taking one pill after another.
I feel a little scared,
But I'm almost done.
I give into the darkness,
Knowing I will never wake up.
Thinking how much I love my family,
I hope they'll understand.
My mind awakes in confusion,
Am I dreaming...
Or is this death,
what has happen to me.
My mother, she's crying,
I want to scream to her but I can't.
I hear the faint word of a stranger, "she's alive."
Her sobs turn to joy.
I didn't want to wake up and face her
But yet I opened my eyes to the blinding light.
My family...my friends,
Guilt of what I done will never be forgiven.
I try to think of what I had done,
But somehow I lost all sight of that.
I felt the silent tears run down my face
The feel of my skin was cold and scared.
I sit up from the hospital bed, and ask,
"Forgive me, I promise not to waste."
I look away in regret,
Hoping she will for give me.
I felt sorry for all the grief I gave her,
I tell her I will succeed, in leading a better life.
I know I can got to her, she will understand.
Instead of doing it myself.
I was given a second chance.
I will do better, I will be strong.
I could be dead,
but I've learned to live each passing day.
There is always someone there to help through the bad,
your never alone,
look towards a good future,
and learn from the bad in the past.
Weeks felt like months.
I find myself obsessed,
Obsessed with the thought of death.
The thoughts flowed through me like blood,
Heavy tear weighed me down with grief.
Nothing would stop me from hurting,
The pain would just grow stronger inside.
The pain of the razor blade was vast to my skin,
Listening to every droplet of blood.
My heart stopped,
The tears broke through the fear.
I fell weaker each day,
I was being ripped apart, slowly.
Night after night I cried myself to sleep,
But tears were never enough.
I sat down, and thought,
I don't want to live like this any more.
I know I should be strong,
but I am unable.
My mind and fear took over,
My heart is far to scared.
I can't live like this any more,
I'm ready now, I know this is my fate.
My head down,
Taking one pill after another.
I feel a little scared,
But I'm almost done.
I give into the darkness,
Knowing I will never wake up.
Thinking how much I love my family,
I hope they'll understand.
My mind awakes in confusion,
Am I dreaming...
Or is this death,
what has happen to me.
My mother, she's crying,
I want to scream to her but I can't.
I hear the faint word of a stranger, "she's alive."
Her sobs turn to joy.
I didn't want to wake up and face her
But yet I opened my eyes to the blinding light.
My family...my friends,
Guilt of what I done will never be forgiven.
I try to think of what I had done,
But somehow I lost all sight of that.
I felt the silent tears run down my face
The feel of my skin was cold and scared.
I sit up from the hospital bed, and ask,
"Forgive me, I promise not to waste."
I look away in regret,
Hoping she will for give me.
I felt sorry for all the grief I gave her,
I tell her I will succeed, in leading a better life.
I know I can got to her, she will understand.
Instead of doing it myself.
I was given a second chance.
I will do better, I will be strong.
I could be dead,
but I've learned to live each passing day.
There is always someone there to help through the bad,
your never alone,
look towards a good future,
and learn from the bad in the past.
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